Many people believe that when they go and see a coach they are going to say, “Do this” or “You should do that”, but this is not the case. This is how a mentor operates. A mentor is somebody who has achieved similar results to those that the client, you, want to have in your life, whether that's in business, relationships or health. They will guide you to arrive at the results that they have already achieved themselves.
A coach operates in a very different way; a coach is somebody that enables you to distinguish what ways of thinking you're running that are not serving you. What ways of thinking that you subconsciously believe that cause you to operate on a nervous (survival) kind of level or at an ineffective level of performance.
The optimum coach to find is one who has a lot of life experience who can then incorporate mentoring in to their coaching. Due to the ill health I've rebalanced from, the many businesses I've set up and run, as well as the numerous relationships I've healed and found love in, I am that coach. I now have over 200 clients who report that their lives have transformed completely through me providing them with my transformational coaching.
One thing I've noticed is that most people spend their life predominantly trying to 'fit in' or 'be liked' or 'be wanted'. But all that trying to fulfil these illusive ideologies does is lead us to exhaustion and to never being fulfilled. So a coach is never going to tell you how to live your life. A true coach (a transformational coach especially) is going to enable you to distinguish the interpretations that you've made up about yourself that you're then attempting to counteract.
With a good coach, you can 'un-learn' the interpretations you've invented about yourself (as a result of a failed business this could be 'I'm a failure' or from a failed relationship it could be 'I'm not loved') and free yourself of them. Once you do so, you can access a whole new ability in expressing yourself. You can be honest about yourself with others. You can say, "Yes, I have a heart. I've got memories. I had things happen to me. I've failed. I've messed up. And you know what? I'm OK with it."
Truth is, everyone fails and everyone messes up. Happiness isn't about not being messed up; happiness is about being OK about being messed up. The nonsense in my head is relentless! I just choose not to entertain it! And the more I don't entertain it, the less power it has over me and the more at peace I am.
So, today, practise listening to your thoughts. If you don't feel empowered, ask yourself, "What am I thinking now?" Or "What have I been thinking today?" And when you see thoughts that don't serve you, simply watch them and don't entertain them. Bring yourself back to your centre. Your centre is who you are. It's what you're up to and what you're committed to creating in the world. Get in touch with this and operate from this place of inspiration. If you do so, it won't matter what is running through your head because you'll be so committed to what you're up to that you will break through any barrier and any challenge.
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Whatever you do, remember; dare to dream the dream. Dare to choose the dream. Dare to live the dream.